Humiliated

Today, we informed Kinderland that we will be pulling Joel out. It was a HORRENDOUS experience. I told huby to speak to the teacher about the farewell party because I was busy completing my work. I was thinking of throwing a small farewell party for Joel so had wanted to get the approval of the teacher.

We told them the reason why we wanted Joel out, that we were not too happy with the management and the ethics. The teacher couldn't approve of the farewell party. Fine. No farewell party then. Then one of the teachers told hubby "BUT you have to give one month notice!". The teacher looked hubby up and down and commented "So, can I presume that you won't pay for your son school fees?". My God!!! Then she said, "do you know that the school fees are deducted by Giro and we don't have to stop Giro deduction because it is stated that 1 month notice is required". What the FUCK! To set the record straight, our school fee is not paid by Giro. It is paid by cheque. Now, even if it is paid by Giro, we can jolly well cancel the Giro payment since school fees will only be deducted after 4 September. So, you want to sue me to court??

The way the teacher put it, and the way she looked (up and down), she was thinking that we couldn't afford the school fees and that we are cheapskate parents! Such arrogant attitude of the school!!!! They even tried to justify the fee increment by stating matter-of-factly that they should have increased the school fee early this year but they are (kind enough) to delay until the last term before they increase the fee. To them, it is NOT unethical. To them, we are just cheapo parents who cannot afford their school fees and we are just picking on their policies to make ourselves look better. They cannot see the fact that it is not the MONEY issue. I can afford the $120 increment, for goodness sake! But I just don't want to pay!!! They look down on us and humiliate us!! Hubby argued but their mentality is fixed. We just didn't kick up a storm because Justin is still in the school!

Bloody hell! I am still angry and when I am angry, I cannot think right!!!!!!!!!!

Hubby and Games

Since I know hubby, I have already known of his obsession with games - computer games, playstation games, xbox games and whatever.... So, it is nothing new to me over his craze with games. I mean, this is the man I marry. And when I enter into this marraige, I already know he is like that. And I know I cannot change much over this aspect of him.

He has often told me, it is better that he is obsessed with games, than with women. Though I don't take such an "excuse" as an excuse, I know I shouldn't take his obsession too much to heart and I should just treat it as a form of relaxation for him.

However, when he starts his game craze again, it really irks me to no end. This has arose because of bad memory in the past. When we were dating, he could spend days after days in front of the computer. He could survive on cookies and crackers . No sleep. He hardly had any time for me. I would just be staring at his back. And his priority was such that I was placed at the 3rd place, his granny 2nd and his games at the 1st, which really pissed me off because I HAVE to be first, no doubt about that. Oh yeah... I am unreasonable. Even when I was his girlfriend, I have to be number 1.

Now that we are married, his priorities have shifted. I am at the number 1, kids number 2, work number 3 and then comes to his games. Still, his games is an important aspect of his life.

His mind is often thinking of the latest games machine. It could be xbox today and playstation 2(or 3?) tomorrow. He will think of all the games he could play. He could even lose his sleep to playing games.

I am still quite intolerant to his games. Whenever he asked me to join him in any games, I will flatly refused. When I see my kids following his trend, I will get all worked up and screamed at my kids. Sometimes, even when Justin and Joel didn't do anything wrong, just the sight of them in front of the games machine pissed me off so much that I would shout at them. If they talk too much about games, I would scream at them too. Hubby frowned at my behavoir. I know I have over-reacted, but I cannot control myself.

To save my sanity, I think I will reduce the kids' games time. It is hard for me to handle hubby's obsession with games because I married him knowing he is like that. But I don't want to anger myself further by dealing with the kids' obsession with games. If I cannot control my hubby, I will control my kids. If their hobby irks me so much, I think there is no point in supporting their likings. Eventhough there is really nothing wrong with playing games, it will drive mommy crazy!

I don't blame hubby for behaving this way. Everyone of us has perculiar habits or obsession. It is not that hubby changed after he is married. He is still the way he was. Moreover, it is just games - his hobby and past time, and really, it's no big deal. He didn't neglect me or the kids. So why am I complaining? Well, it is something within myself that I have to work on.

Joel last days in school

Today is the last two days that Joel will be attending school. After the school holiday starts, I will pull him out of his current school, Kinderland. He will only be enrolled in another new school next year.

To a certain extend, I feel guilty in pulling him out of school. But I know it is a neccessary evil. If it has not been Justin's last term in school, and his graduation year, before he enters primary 1, I would have pulled him out too. I am not happy with the school's management and ethics and I think it is a waste of money to let my kids conitnue their studies in this school. I won't consider a school as ethical when they try to increase the school fees at the last term when half of the term is school holiday. Shouldn't it be done on the start of a new year?

Moreover, I notice that the school is gearing towards unethical profit-making eversince the new principal took over. They charges $350 for a course on taking care of pets. Why $350 when such education could be taught free-of-charge at the SPCA? When I read through the content of the course, it is basically common sense theroy when they taught how to take care of the pet, responsibility blah blah blah.... It doesn't warrant $350 for some common-sense talk. Then there are the lego lessons that cost a whopping $400+. They are supposedly to teach you how to be creative. I could have bought tons of lego and let my kids practise on their own without the hefty charges. I recieve letters every week asking for payment of this and that. By the amount of money I pay to the school, I could have enrolled them in numerous enrichment courses. Moreover, hubby commented that the kids do not learn much things in school.

The school increases their fees by $100+, and now I'm paying $900 per term for 1 kid. They deliberately do so at the last term. Fine, they can go ahead and do whatever unethical stuff they deem appropriate to make money but I am pulling my kids out and I hope many parents will do so to show our displeasure.

Somehow I feel that Kinderland will not be defeated. It is afterall a brand name that rich parents go for, even with whatever crab ciriculum they have. Somehow, rich people have a different mentality from average families like us. I bet they don't mind paying exhobitant fees for courses because they equate expensive = good. I don't think they truely evaluate what are the contents of the courses. As long as it's "Kinderland", then it must be "good".

So, it's with deep regret that I have to pull Joel out eventhough Joel enjoys time spent with his classmates tremendously. Kids are innocent. And I know all these friends have given Joel much joy and companionship during his less-than-a-year short stay at Kinderland. I have spoken to the hubby and we have decided to throw a small farewell party for Joel. We will also speak to his teacher that we have nothing against the class. It is the management that we are not happy about.

In return, I will enroll Joel in enrichment course that he enjoys.

Bloody Shit CAT

I am NOT a cat lover. And I am getting so damn bloody pissed with this sickening black cat that is haunting me/us!

There is this fucking BIG black cat which is not afraid of anyone of us. It would glare at us and followed us wherever we go. Whatever we do won't rid it of us. It has the tendency of sitting in front of my house, starring at my gate, like waiting for us. It is especially "hooked" to me. Bloody shit asshole!

I'm so so so SO SO ANGRY with it when it came into the house today. Lani tried to chase it away. No use! So together with Pony, they tried to chase it away. The bloody cat ran everywhere except the door. Then it decided to run into my bedroom and to my precious bed!!! I'm so freaking PISSED that fear escaped me and I took a whole bunch of newspaper, rolled it up and aimed at its damn shit head and threw with my full force. If only it hits its head, but too bad it didn't!!! How dare the freaking cat go to my bed! Finally, Lani chased it out of MY house. If she didn't, I would have taken the chopper and chop it to pieces! I would have killed it with my bare hands. Stupid bloody cat!

Whatever animal lover out there or cat lover or whatever, condemn me if you want, but I don't care! I HATE CATS!! I seriously swear I WILL KILL that black cat and chop it to pieces like a piece of garbage if it ever dare to step on my bed again! If anyone were to tell me off for cursing this cat, I will shoot you down too! If you are not happy with the way I curse at the stupid useless cat, then DON'T READ!

GO to hell, you damn bloody asshole CAT!!!!!!!

Prostitute tour

This evening, since hubby and I were very tired and had no mood to work, we decided to do something crazy. We decided to drive to Geylang to look at prostitutes. Since we just had instant noodles for dinner, we were thinking of grabbing supper on our way home.

Initially, I was wearing a spaghetti top, braless. But for the sake of venturing to that place with all those "hungry" buayas, I decided to wear a loose fitting T-shirt with a decent bra so that I would not be mistaken as a hooker.

We drove to Lorong 18. We saw lots of hotels and some brothels with their trademark red light. I tried to peer into the house to look at the women but I didn't see many of them. They were probably busy at "work", I guess.

I saw this dingy adult toy shop that caught my eyes. It was in a secluded corner. It looked interesting enough since it was in the middle of a row of brothels. I wanted to look at the lingerie but I hesitate in getting out of the vehicle because the sight outside was just too daunting for me. Evil-looking middle age men were walking in groups, oogling at women, and there were of course those men who stood outside the house trying to lure these men into the brothels. Then there were also the groups threatening-looking foreign workers. Just alot and alot of men. I just felt uncomfortable mingling with these crowds of people. So I decided to stay put in the vehicle, driven by hubby.

Next, we turned into a corner lane. Wow! The sight that greeted us was quite amazing. There were lots of "freelance" there standing by the road. They were quite charming. They were clad in little clothes and all dolled up. Their figures were good. They don't look local to me. I think they are from China. I suspect some are Indonesians. But the majority are from China. It is here where I see alot of men oogling at these womens and some approached and talked to them. Hubby also looked. I don't mind. Cos I looked too. LOL.

Well, I had seen enough and we proceeded to drive home. I didn't have any appetite for food so we went to buy some durians instead, for hubby.

I told the hubby, so these men want to have easy sex with these women. Fine. But they better prepare themselves for the deadly disease, AIDS. And if one day they have AIDS, sorry, I have no sympathy for them.

Betting

Today, hubby and I (with my parents) went to the hawker centre for dinner. After dinner, hubby was looking to buy some desserts for us. He came across a curry puff store at a corner and stopped to buy some. The owner told him that he sold lots of curry puff a day, more than 2000 curry puff and his business was very good. Then, for no reason, he asked hubby to buy lottery, on his shop's number and told him that his shop number has come out top prizes on two occasions.

Hubby came to me and told me about this. He asked me whether he should bet on the numbers, as what he was told by the store owner. I felt alittle uncomfortable and told him I wanted to think about it. After a while, I told him no. I don't want to bet on the numbers. Just because of the fact that the owner told hubby to buy, and not because hubby himself wanted to buy.

Firstly, I don't really believe in lottery. I don't think we have such luck. We are the kind of people who need to work hard so as to achieve. Money just do not fall from the sky for us. Secondly, it's fine with me if we suddenly have an inspiration to bet on a certain combination of number or to bet on familiar numbers such as our house number or whatever. BUT, it's not alright if someone else, especially a stranger, came to us and told us to buy some set of number. It makes me feel as if I owe this stranger a favour if the number were to strike.

I explained to the hubby why I am not comfortable with betting these number. He understand of course. Maybe I am a coward but I would rather not take a risk when it comes to such things. I would rather be "free" from any possible burden and consequences. I am not one to be blinded with such greed. Throw a million dollar my way, for no reason, and I'll tell you, I will not accept. Nothing comes free and if it is not from someone I know, or for a reason that I think I should deserve this money, I'll throw this 1 million dollar back to you.

Right and Wrong

Justin came to me yesterday and sadly told me,

Justin : "Mommy, Keith said that I am a lousy girl. I am a bad girl".

Me : "You are NOT lousy. You are NOT a girl. "

Justin : "But mommy, he said that I am bad."

Me : "Tell Keith you are NOT bad. You are a good boy. Keith is a naughty boy to say such nasty things".

Justin: "Mommy, Keith push me and my back hits Mrs Ching sharp corner of the table".

Me : "How did you react, darling?"

Justin: "Nothing."

Me :"Next time when such thing happens, tell Keith strongly that you are not a bad boy. He is bad boy for pushing. When he wants to hit you, raise up your hand to block. And tell him loudly, NO. If Mrs Ching is around, tell Mrs Ching what Keith did to you. You are not a bad boy. Keith is wrong to do that to you".

Justin : "ok, mommy"

Throughout the afternoon, Justin was in a terrible mood. I think he felt that he was being bullied so he was very frustrated and I often heard quarrelling with his brother. I told Justin that this is no way to behave. If he feels that wrongs have been done to him, then he should stand up for himself, target the problem right there and then. He shouldn't come back, felt he was bullied, and took it out on us or his younger brother.

That night, Justin spoke to his daddy regarding the bully.

Justin: " Daddy, Keith pushed me. Keith said I am a bad girl".

Daddy: "What! What did you do? Did you push him back?"

Justin: "No"

Daddy: "Next time, if he pushed you, pushed him back.

Justin: "But mommy said cannot fight".

Daddy: "It's not fighting. It's self defense. If you let people bully you once, he will bully you again and again. You have to put a stop to it. If he push you once, you push him back once. You cannot push him back twice because that is bully. Just once. You have to protect youself so that nobody will hurt you. "

Little Joel: "Daddy, if big brother's friend bully him, I will punch him, kick him and throw him to the floor".

Me: "No. That is bully."

Daddy: "Justin, you have to fight back if anyone were to hurt you. Daddy and Mommy will not always be around to protect you. You have to protect yourself. People beat you, you beat back. People push you, you push back. People kick you, you kick back. Daddy and mommy will not blame you if you protect yourself but you cannot start a fight. Always remember, you let a person hits you once, he will hit you again and again."

Gosh! Hubby and I taught him different things though our philisophy is the same. I don't encourage violence but hubby felt that it's ok to fight if situation needs him to. Hubby told me that it's not alright to keep complaining to the teacher because Justin will be viewed by his peers as a weakling and he will be laughed at and his school life will be miserable. There are bound to be bullies around so he has to stand up for himself and fight to protect his integrity if neccessary so that his self esteem will not be crushed. Even if Justin or Joel were to get into trouble, he will still support them as long as he feels that the cause is right. Teachers can stepped in, in certain situations but as he grows older, he will find that teachers can no longer be used to deal with his peers and bullies.

Maybe hubby is right. Afterall, he has tutored young kids/teenagers for many years and his students, whom are problematic teenagers, are able to confide in him problems which they cannot confide in their own parents and teachers. Hubby must have done something right there for a teenage boy to confide his problems in him.

I have to agree with hubby that if one day, my sons were to get into trouble for fighting and breaking rules, I will not judge until I hear what my sons have to say. And if I find that my sons have reasons to act in the way they do, even if it's against the rules, I have no qualms to stand up for them. I don't want to bring them up to be law abiding citizens that goes by the book. I want to bring them up to be men with integrity and principles.

Wanna Know What I Think About You ?

What's your darkest ultimate fear?

That I would give birth to a deaf child.

I've taken the baton from Jin so am continuing the race.

Leave me a comment and I will answer these for you, look back in the comments section for your answers...

1. I'll respond with a random thought I have about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (or so we think).
5. I'll tell you my first memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your blog

Choosing sex

Sometimes, I can't help but feel that nature has its way of guiding you towards a course. I cannot remember when that I started loathing the contraceptive in me. Then it started to give me so much problems that we decided to take it out.

At the same time, hubby just wanted to go for unpaid leave and this would ultimately lead to his resignation. He would be taking over the main duties that I am currently holding. That gives me some breathing space to either rest or focus on other aspects of the business.

Somehow, the thought of having a 3rd child strikes us around this time too. It seems crazy, especially at a time when the future is filled with so much uncertainties. The logical thing to do is to put our baby-making project on hold until a time when we are more sure of where we stand. However, it just seems, in our heart, that the time is right. It's very hard to explain that kind of feeling.

Now, if I view it in another way, that is, a positive way, isn't nature preparing me to be pregnant and to ensure continuity of the business, by hubby taking over my job? All conditions are favourable now and I know we can afford a third baby. Even if we can't, I know we will make it work. There are the uncertainties of course, but what is there that is certain, in the first place?

I am still not 100% sure of a 3rd child. Hubby and I would very much want to have a girl. And we have even bought this book from Borders book store. I have read it and understood what is said and taught.



The thing is, deep inside, I feel that we shouldn't mess around with nature. What is mine will be mine. What is not mine shouldn't be forced. Am I manipulating mother nature by attempting to choose the sex of my baby?

Then again, another arguement of me is, am I really attempting to change mother nature? If I am destined to have a boy, irregardless of the time of sex or whatever that is taught in the book to increase my chances of having a girl, somehow the male sperm will still have a way to make its way to the egg, isn't it? It's not that I use medical intervention to separate the male or the female sperm which is an act against nature. All acts are still "natural" in a way, isn't it?

So, it's with all these debates in mind that I am still putting my baby-making project on hold. I am quite certain that we would give number 3 a try, I just don't know whether I should even try to increase my chances of having a girl or I should just let nature takes it course.

An accident I witness

Yesterday, on my way from fetching hubby back from work, I came across an accident, right before my eyes. It was a grotesque, serious accident. The man was sprawled on the floor, huge amount of blood oozing out of him and onto the road. I reckon that the man could be dead or very very seriously injured. He could either be a pedestrian or a motorcyclist. Being timid, I was of course spooked by the sight. But the more intense feeling that I was experencing was one of sadness and regret. Lying there could be someone's else husband, father or son. His family would be devastated if they didn't see him home tonight, or they might just never see him or talk to him again.

That just bring me to another thought. Why do people drive so carelessly and put themselves and other road users to danger? My daily experience on the road makes me draw the conclusion that Singaporeans are truely an impatient lot. You must move off fast at a traffic junction, you must drive fast, people cutting lanes at ridiculously close and dangerous distance and motorcyclist weaving around. I used to be frightened by all these sights when I started driving. Though I am no longer intimidated by other road users, I am still upset by the irresponsible attitude of most of the road users. What is wrong with giving way? Why do people have to speed up once you make a signal that you want to cut into their lane? Why do people have to honk at the slightest provoke? I cannot understand. And I regard all these people as truely uncivilised. Even the hubby is one nasty driver. He cut lanes unneccessarily and glare at other drivers. I am often turn off by his driving habits. I feel that drivers in other countries are far better than we do. Yes, they drive fast but they drive safely and they give way as much as they can.

I am not saying that I am a fantastic driver. To those impatient drivers out there, I am a "bad" driver who is too slow for comfort. No, I am not slow, I just watch my speed limit. The speed limit is not implemented for no reason. I give way as much as I can and I don't honk unless it is a dangerous situation and I need to honk to alert. I always give way to motorcyclist as I feel that they are the most vulnerable lot. Yes, they can be very inconsiderate, do not observe traffic rules, but it doesn't take much to just give way to them. I do not bother by how other drivers label me. As long as I can travel from Point A to Point B, with all my passengers safe and sound, and also making sure that other road users are not endangered by me, my conscience is clear.

If only Singaporean can learn to be more forgiving, there would be less cases of accidents and road rage. Why must something happen to us before we wake up?

Can Mommy Teach?

I don't think I could ever tutor my kids. I just do not have the patience. I used to be a tuiton teacher before and had taught lower and upper primary students. That was donkey years ago when my english was still decent. Nowadays, my english had deteriorated so much that I could not get my tenses right and of course, my brain had become rusty when it comes to academic work.

It's not only that. Somehow, facing other kids and facing my own kids are 2 different things. I used to have the patience to teach other students but now, when it comes to my own kids, I hardly have any patience to teach them. I would explain to them once, twice, and when it comes to the third time and they still could not get their sum right, I could feel my blood boiling. It is always the case when I started out speaking softly and patiently but it would soon escalate to a stage when my voice is raised and I grow really impatient and furious when my method and instructions are not followed. Justin would always look at me with his teary eyes and said, "But I thought daddy would be teaching me this?". Ahhhhh.... he knows that Daddy has more patience than Mommy and Daddy's method is more easily understood than Mommy's. It's fine, I'm more than willing to pass on this task to hubby as I know I really am not in a position to teach. I may just kill their interest towards learning altogether.

Now when daddy teach, Justin would sit on the table and listen or do what daddy asked him to do. Joel would ask to be seated together with his big brother to do his "homework". If I say I am going to teach, both would avoid me and Joel would run away. LOL

Hubby told me, it has been a known fact that Mommies can't teach their own kids without screaming their head off. Maybe it's true afterall...

Recovered

Finally, after lots of sleep and rest, I am up and running again! What makes me happy is that hubby has tried, over the weekend, to take over some of my main duties and has learnt quite a bit of stuff. At least now, he is not lost when I speak to him of what I do and he would be of help when his leave starts. It's less than 20 days before his leave starts and I think I am looking forward to it. Maybe for a start, when he takes over my duties, I will not jump into other duties yet, but I'll probably take a short rest to catch up with the kids, family and friends especially Jin. Would love to spend some time with her and the 2 princesses.

I just hope the future will be bright and cheery! I am positive and I know everyone will turn out fine.

Still sick

It is rare that I will fall sick for more than 3 days but this time round, I am really sicker than I thought I was. Today, which is a Saturday, I am still feeling sick. We stayed home most part of the day so that I could rest.

I am feeling very groggy due to the medicine. I hate to take these types of medicine that causes drowsiness. But I have no choice because whatever alternative therapy that used to work on me, don't work this time. Even when I drove this afternoon to fetch hubby from work, I feel as if I am floating in the air. That reminds me never to drive in such condition again. I would be a danger to myself and to other road users.

Tomorrow Justin would be attending another swimming class. I hope I would be well enough to go down the pool too. Monday would be the start of my yoga lesson. I would be dragging hubby to join me too. Hopefully there are some male species attending the class, or I am pretty sure hubby will not want to join the lesson.

I am feeling groggy all over again. Must be the medicine at work. It's bed time.

Tong Hua

This chinese song touches the core of my heart. I rarely listen to chinese songs but this is one that captures my heart. Hubby is also very touched by this song. He watched with me throughout the entire clip. I am not a person to cry much in real life situation BUT I am capable of crying buckets when I watch any sad shows or read any books with tragic endings. This tragic love story did make me tear.

http://www.lcbtv.com/flash/movie/tonghua.swf

Sweet or not?

Hubby passed me this note when I drove him back from work and he knew I was terribly sick.

Dearest Wife

I aspire to be a better husband.

One filled with strength to hold
you when your soul is weary.

One filled with courage to face
your life's adversity.

One filled with gratitude to appreciate
all the beautiful things that you
have brought me.

Most of all, one filled with love
to forever hold you in my heart

Loving You Always
Jay

Joel strange necklace

Justin has a necklace that he wears around his neck. Joel has always expressed his interest in having one too. One day, Justin's necklace that was holding on to the pendant came loose and we tried to hunt for another necklace for Justin. Joel saw it and cried for a similar necklace saying why his brother has it and he doesn't.

So, hubby went searching for a necklace for Joel. We finally found a very similar one that we bought from Thailand. It was a small wood pendant that was engraved. We put this necklace around Joel and he was finally satisfied. After that, we didn't think much about it.

However, I noticed that Joel became naughtier. I didn't bother much about it because Joel has always been naughty. I became concern when he started vomitting, became sick and listless. I thought he was down with some kindda virus. However, there was no fever and he didn't vomit everytime he ate his food. Sometimes he vomit, sometimes he didn't. Sometimes he was active, sometimes he was listless.

I was looking at him when his wood necklace caught my eyes and I felt a sense of discomfort. I quickly told him to come over and immediately took away his necklace. He didn't fight against me. In fact, he was very willing to give up his necklace, which was so unlike him. As fast as he started vomitting after putting on the necklace, his vomiting stopped IMMEDIATELY. He revert back to his usual self, as bouncy and cheeky as ever, and he never ask for a necklace again.

Hubby has always told me, I do have an instinct within myself. It's just that I am in BIG denial. He told me that even sometimes when I feel something, I would give him some crab excuses like "I don't know", "Don't ask me-I cannot feel anything". And I will keep quiet and will not share anything because I choose to believe that I am ignorant and do not have an instinct. Or I will ask ignorant and stupid questions of which I know the answers deep down.

Maybe like what hubby said, I am in denial and will choose to ignore and bury that instinct in me, if there is one at all (see... this is denial. LOL). Maybe I will react appropriately in times of crisis, or maybe I never will.

Sick! Sick!

Oh Shit! I hate this feeling of being sick! The stupid running nose that makes me sneeze and tears. The achy body that feels like it's going to break into pieces. This is the second time within a month that I fall sick. Gosh! What's wrong with me? Must be the stupid weather. During my business trip, the weather was so hot that I thought I was baked. It was like 38-40 celcius. Then when I went back to the hotel, I froze due to the sudden temperature change. When I came back to Singapore, it bagan to rain or shine. Sometimes so hot, sometimes so cold and rainy. I am out fetching the kids to and fro school, fetching hubby from work and run errands from time to time. Plus my work, I think my body just cannot take the stress anymore, my immunity drops and I fall sick.

Usually, when I know I'm about to fall sick, I would take in a whole lot of chilli. Especially the super spicy chilli padi. I would cook a bowl of noodles or whatever, then I would dump the chilli padi inside the noodle. After the meal, my stomach and body would start to become very hot and burning, and after some time, I would miraculously be better and I would recover in a day or 2. I am trying this remedy again and I hope it will work. I hate medicine. It makes me drowsy and incapable to work.

At my this kind of state, it must be out of my mind to think of conducting a Birkenstock shopping spree in a local forum. Actually, my primary purpose is to get hubby a good pair of shoes for his almost flat feet. He is having so much problems with his ankle that I thought we should just spend to get him a really good pair of shoes for his problematic leg. His current shoe is spoilt and he is basically shoe-less. I had all worked out and even left my message in the forum. After some thoughts, I was in time to cancel my shopping spree. I mean, it's just not worth it to go through the trouble to collate and organize payment and collection for the sake of hubby's shoes. I expect alot of problems, requests and demands from the forumers. On top of that, what happen if wrong size is shipped or there is a short shipment? How am I going to account to these forumers? I am going to have hell man! Moreover, if I am going to spend so much money on a pair of shoe, it would be such a waste if it doesn't fit. Ordering online for shoes without trying can so risky. What happens if the size is not right, the fit is not right, etc? Don't forget hubby has problem legs and can be very picky when it comes to shoes. There are so many pairs of good shoes that he has tried but doesn't fit him comfortably. Luckily I am in time to pull out my shopping spree since no one has placed any order yet. Phew....

Well... from time and time again, I have told myself, don't get others involve during purchases. Even hubby told me that he would rather spent more money to pay for higher shipping fee than to combine purchases with other people so as to get a lower shipping fee. I should keep reminding myself of that, instead of being cheapo to save myself a couple of dollars of shipping fee and live at the mercy of others' regulations, inconvenience and restrictions.

Feelings...

Actually I have alot of work to do. But there's just so much that is on my mind that I just want to blog about how I feel.

Jin has finally broken the news about her stage 1 cervical cancer. I would be lying if I said I am not sad. But then I know, that sadness and devastation will not help the situation in any way. She has enough to think about to be further burden by another person's sadness.

This brings back memories of the time my mom was striken with cancer. Of course, my mom didn't have the kind of fighting spirit as Jin. My mom depended much on me to guide her through the ordeal of treatment and surgery. I knew I had to be strong for her. Deep inside, it hurts to see her in the depressive state she was but I had to put on a brave front so that she could draw some strength from me, which she did. It was a trying time for everyone.

I believe all is in the mind. If you think you will win, you will win despite whatever outcome it turns out to be. I am a positive person. I believe however bad the situation is, there is always hope, and miracle.

For Jin, I just hope the people surrounding her, especially her family, will not wallow in sadness. It is tough enough to be geared up for a battle, and it would be tougher still to deal with the depressing emotions around her.

To Jin,
I will be with you through this ordeal. You need a listening ear, you know you will have me to turn to. You need someone to drive you for treatments, you know who you can call. You need food, I can ask Pony to cook you some if you can stomach her low salt food (I can't, I love my salt. LOL). You need babysitter, I'm here. You want me to scrub chestnut to help you reduce heatiness from therapy, no problem. You need to rest, my house always welcomes you. You need a kick in the ass when you are feeling down, ohhhh... I would be more than willing to, just tell me in advance so that I can practise my kicks to give you a hard one. *evil grin*.

Stay strong and positive. You will make it through!!!!

Brown Rice Chips

I talked about this brown rice chips some time ago but in my last trip, I didn't manage to buy it because the trip was too rushed and I was caught in massive traffic jams. This is something that I am not able to find anywhere except this place called "Cabbages and Condoms". However, Cabbages and Condoms is located quite far away and it is in an inconvenient location.

For this trip, I managed to get to this place and I did manage to get these brown rice chips. I didn't get alot as I was told they ran out of stock. This is one of the nicest healthy chips I came across. Justin and Joel simply love it and have been asking for it everyday. It's a healthy snack for them so I don't mind giving them these chips in replacement of chocalate cookies and junk food. Jin, I got some for you too.

It is made of brown rice. Actually, it's not even brown rice. It is made of red rice, you know the kind of rice that is totally unpolished. In the restuarant, all dishes are served with red jasmine rice and they basically served very healthy food. However, the food and chips are a bit pricey. Then again, they are doing this for a good cause for victims of Aids. The proceed that they get from the sale of these chips will also go to improving the life of poor farmers. Considering the kind of luxury we are enjoying, it's just a little that we could do on our part to return to the society what we have gained.

The package look big on these pictures. They are actually very small packets.

Hubby's aches

I was very tired and slept well the entire night. However, being a light sleeper, I still woke up from time to time. I noticed hubby in pain throughout the night. He couldn't sleep well. His shoulder and back hurts and he kept tossing and turning.

I guess it is his injury. He already has problems with his shoulder and back. Whenever we go for our business trip, he was required to carry lots of goods and stock. I think it aggravates his condition. I am planning to drive him to a chinese physician for treatment tonight. I just don't know which is a good one. He has been to several and it seems that none is able to solve his problem. And I think one even worsen his condition by a wrong manipulation of bones, thereby causing him numbness at one side of the body. I told hubby that since his injury is close to his spine, I dare not just let him go to any chinese physician. What happens if a wrong twist of bone causes injury to his spine that leads to paralysis? I dare not take a risk here.

But, he has to go for treatment. He can't possibly be in pain every night. I have put up my request for recommendation in a forum and hopefully, I'll get good recommendation from there. I am also thinking of enrolling both of us to yoga sessions conducted by a professional instructor. Hubby has too much aches and pains and I think some theurapetic stretches will do him good.

My trip

"Drained" is what I would describe my physical body. "Cranky" is what I would describe how I feel. Loads of work piling up, Lani and her moods, the demanding kids....

My recent business trip is nothing eventful. Just the hotel that I dislike. Oh well... I never seem able to find a suitable hotel that fits into what I like. It's either too "dark", too dilapidated or too messy.

This time round, I change another hotel and went to stay in Holiday Inn. I expected some kind of standard. Afterall, it is an international chain. However, it was disappointing. The place was in a BAD location and we had a hard time looking for food. I didn't want to eat street food due to hygiene. I don't mind if my purpose there was to have fun but because it was purely business, I couldn't afford to screw up my trip and meetings and got into food poisoning. I needed restaurant-standard food like a decent local restarant, KFC or Mc Donald. There was NONE. We ended up hungry and skipped our lunch and went to complete our task. We went to Chinatown, desparate for any decent food. NONE again. All were street food and we could see flies flying on the food. Arrghh. I couldn't work with an empty tummy. Luckily we managed to find a 7-eleven convenience store and bought the ready snack and gulped down our food greedily.

When I stepped into the hotel, I was scared. Don't ask me why because I don't know. I can never understand my feelings when it comes to such things and I would rather not dwell into it. The first thing that greeted us was a 4 face buddha which was quite a common sight in Thailand. Then when we walked into the hotel, we saw a huge Indian diety. It was for prayers because we saw the praying mat. I couldn't understand why because why would Holiday Inn, such an established hotel chain, had an Indian diety right in the middle of the hotel lobby and a 4 face buddha at the outside of the hotel? Hmmm... Jin, maybe you know why?

Anyway, my room was assigned at the 7th floor. Right at the side of our room was an empty room. The wall was kinda thin and I thought I heard some noise coming from the room from time to time. The next day, I realized that the room was empty. One of the staff entered it and I caught a glimpse of it. It appears that the room was deliberately left empty because the beds and the furnishings were covered with white cloth. How the hell then did the sound come about?

At night, we took a short ride to view the night market. It seems that the hubby was the centre of attraction. Everywhere we went, the women (or rather the MEN) would tell him "come...come...good sex... all positions". I was quite amused so I purposely walked behind him. One man even wrap his arm around hubby and inviting him for some good sex. LOL.

I wanted to go for a thai massage. I went into two and was taken back by the loads of men and women in a dimly light environment. It shoudn't be surprising given that it is a red light district but it is equally duanting to be massged in that kind of environment. I couldn't imagine being left alone. How to relax like that? So, I ran away. I gave up finding a place to massage in that area.

The next day was again a mad rush, trying to rush for meetings, visit to factory and so on. I heaved a sigh of relief when I checked out of the hotel. I will never go back to the hotel again, not so much of the darkness, but more that I would appreciate a place with more food. I can't possibly travel 20 minutes by cab just to get to a restarant and I am not willing to pay the exobitant fee that the hotel charges for a plate of sandwich (more than SG$40!). Day light robbery?

Duh....

Mommy's Bra

Yesterday evening, when we came back from our outing, I immediately took off my bra as I felt very uncomfortable with the underwire thingy. I left it on the side of my bed and went about doing my things. This is what greeted me when I came back. They were crazy over mommy's BRA!

Jo's pre school

The seacrh for Jo's preschool is on. He is currently in nursery in Kinderland. I would be switching him to another school after this year. So that means, he will start his K1 fresh in another pre-school.

I have seen quite a few pre school but none to my satisfaction. I am not looking particularly for air conditioned classrooms since no matter what, when they enter primary schools, they are not going to get air con rooms. But I am looking for at least well ventilated rooms that are not too cramped. So far, none meet my criteria.

The 2 most important factors I am emphasing are the ciriculum and the environment. I am looking more for a school with a play-based environment and creative learning while not neglecting the acedemic area. It's so hard to find!

I went to St Hildas kindergarten. I am not at all happy with what I see. The place is so hot and I feel that it is not well ventilated. Also, the school emphasis is on written work with tons and tons of homework, spelling and dictation. The class size is huge too.

Hubby however thinks that I am too picky. He cannot understand what is wrong with a school that has lots of written work since it is good for Jo as he is lazy. I am just worried that putting him in such a school will kill whatever interest he has towards learning. Hubby also thinks that I my questions are stupid when I asked the principals whether there are any enrichment
programs by the school, whether the kids will have their meals there, qualification of the teachers etc etc. Am I asking stupid questions? I thought it's quite relavant for me to make a decision!

I don't know... we are not agreeing in this area. And of course, I have the ultimate say. I told him that whatever that comes to the kids, I will seek his opinions and it will be taken into consideration but the ultimate decision will still lie on me. I just don't trust anyone to decide anything for my kids including the daddy.

So, the search is still on.... sigh.

YES!!!!

Yes! Justin finally got into Kong Hwa School!!!! Hubby and I are so happy! Never in our life have we thought that we could be such nervous parents. We thought we could be relax when it comes to education. How wrong we are!

We have been nervous since yesterday. We couldn't even sleep until very late in the night (or early in the morning). We tried to pretend that it didn't matter but in our hearts, we know it does, because it would determine the fate of our 2 kids. Just imagine, 6 years of school life! It is not a long period, neither is it short. So, a good school does matter in shaping this 6 years of my child's life!

We went there early this morning. We were there early by half an hour. They were doing the preparation for the balloting. As the time draws near, more parents turn up. The school hall is filled with tension. Parents were called up to volunteer to draw the lots. Each parent will draw 9 lots. There are only a miserable 63 vacancies. Everyone sits down in anticipation. Hubby was with me. He was chatty but suddenly kept quiet. Yes, we were very nervous. I clasped my hand in fright. And many parents were breathing hard with eyes fixed on the board. Then the names were called, one by one. 15 successful applicants had passed. My son was not one of them. I started to panic. We were down in luck, what happens if this ill-luck thingy is brought to Justin??!!

I was prepared to volunteer myself for the drawing lots, just in hope that I could draw the lot for my son, when we heard it !!!! "JUSTIN" !!!

WOW!!! I slapped hubby's leg and exlaimed "YES!" I nearly cried! Hubby broke into a HUGE smile.

That's it! Justin is in my choice of school! So will Joel! A school that emphasise in chinese culture and heritage and good discipline!

Jin and Aishah, your turn next year. Hope your kiddos will get into the school of your choice!

My 2 darlings

I manage to get some candid shots of the kids when they were playing transformers with each other.

Balloting

Tomorrow is balloting day. It determines whether Justin is able to enter Kong Hwa School, the school of my choice. 77 people are eyeing for 63 vacancies. 14 people would be out and I hope Justin is not one of the 14.

The school that Justin will enter determine the school of Joel too. So I am getting more nervous as the time draws near for the ballot. Eventhough in my heart I am prepared to let Justin enter a not-so-good school if he cannot enter Kong Hwa School, I am still worried that my kids will be affected by the bad influence there. I have often seen kids from the not-so-good schools shouting vulgarity and vandalise the walls and the playground. They get into fights and are a gangster-ly lot. I do not want Justin and Joel to be with such company because I believe irregardless of the moral values that I try to instill in Justin and Joel, peer pressure and the environment play a part in shaping their childhood too. However, I know that if Justin cannot enter Kong Hwa school, I really have no other choices but to put him in that not-so-good school.

Wish me luck for tomorrow! Keeping my fingers and toes crossed!

Busy day

Today is a busy National day holiday for me. I have been out running the entire day, plus work, it is really draining me out. Good thing is, hubby and I managed to bring the kids to see firework. It isn't a really clear view since we are blocked by tall buildings at the kallang river. But at least, the kids did manage to see fireworks!

More entry tomorrow. I'm dead tired!

Heartache

I was working in my work room when I heard Justin coming out of the bedroom. He walked to another room and I heard him calling

"Auntie Lani, could you please help me find my torch?".

I was smiling to myself, such a sweet boy with good manners. I frowned when I heard Lani's response. An abrupt "WHAT!".

Justin carried on to explain himself that he wanted the torch that he brought to school today and he couldn't find it. He wanted to use it in the bedroom together with daddy and daddy had asked him to go out of the room and asked Auntie Lani to help him look for it.

Lani ignored Justin. And when Justin persisted, not in a rude manner, Lani was very harsh to Justin. "You go look for it in the cabinet!" was what Lani told Justin while she still sat on her butt, refusing to help. Then followed by a string of harsh comments towards Justin. Justin dejectedly turned and went back to the bedroom.

My heart bled. Does my son deserve such treatment? He wasn't rude. I would have told him off if he was rude. All he wanted was a torch. He couldn't find it and he needed help. He is sick, just finished his ventolin in his nebuliser, and I think that suffice as a reason to help him.

I stopped myself from any confrontation. I understand that everyone has his/her ups and downs. When one is feeling lowly, she may raise her voice on the kids. Sometimes, I do that too. So I know I need to understand. Moreover, I know Lani does adore the kids. It's just her temperament.

I just feel so much heartache to see my son so dejected. He doesn't warrant such treatment. He has rarely bother Lani. In fact, my 2 kids do not need Lani to entertain them. They keep themselves busy with books, toys and TV. They communicate with each other. So I don't see how they could have got on her nerves. All Lani needs to do is to provide them with food and keep them clean. That's all. I just feel so tired with Lani's yo-yo temperament. I have talked to her about this and she kept quiet. She has been throwing her weights around and I am still tolerating her as I want to give her time to adjust. I seldom intervene into her relationship with the kids cos I want all feelings to flow naturally. In comparison to Pony, she is a much less peaceful person. I no longer find that I am able to reprimand Lani without her getting agitated. Have I been too loose and tolerant of her such that she oversteps her "boundary"? I often wonder...

These days, I feel more at ease with Pony, eventhough I don't show it out. I just feel a sense of contentment that comes out naturally from her. With contentment comes peace from her too.

It doesn't feel good to see my son this way. If my son has done something wrong, it's fine that he's punished. But why should he be punished for being polite and nice?

Long Hair

I promise myself that I would leave my hair and fringe long. I can't say I am as determined as when the time I was going on my losing weight regime but I would still try my best.

The reason why I am doing this is for the hubby. Nah... may be a lame excuse, but really, I would be a sweet wife for once and fullfill his dream of his wife with long flowy hair with fringe that covers half of her face. He said it would be sexy when we make love. But I thought I look more like a ghost with hair covering me like that. No?? LOL.

Anyway, for 31 years of my life, I have only managed to leave my hair long, once. That was when I was super duper FAT and I really hate the look of myself cos the long hair just dragged my face down, making my face flat, and I thought I looked like I was run over by a car.

But now, since I have slimmed down and eventhough I am still flabby here and there, I think I could pass with long hair that could perhaps mersmerised the hubby and maybe give him a good sex session with a mystical look of hair all over my face. So, lets just wish me luck! Not much determination here but if hubby continues to treat me nice, I may just leave my hair long, for him. If he makes me angry, I will chop off my hair. kekeke...

Some thoughts...

This coming Sunday, I would be away on a business trip again. Not too long later, I guess, I would be away again. I used to like travelling, but I feel that I no longer enjoy travelling, not without the kids with me.

Motherhood has changed alot of perspective in my life. Before I had my kids, I used to believe that I would never be a mom who wants to stay at home. I would be a career woman, and kids would not be my priority. In fact, I wouldn't even want to think of having more than 2 kids. I told myself that I would find a maid to look after my kids when they were infants, then I would put the kids in childcare centre and later maybe student care centre when they were old enough. I would never resign my job for them.

Somehow, all have changed since the arrival of Justin and Joel. I am no longer as ambitious as before. My goal in life is very simple, to have a happy family and to bring up responsible and healthy kids. My greatest joy now is to be with Justin and Joel and to see them grow. But I guess, my life is not destined to be a "simple" stay-at-home-mom. I know I cannot leave the business. As an assumption, if hubby is the operations manager that sees to the daily smooth operation of the business, then I would be the marketing and communications manager that overlook the expansion, as well as the marketing and advertising needs of the business. Such is my role and it is nonetheless an important aspect which I cannot afford to give up, lest there would be repercussion.

I know I have to change my mindset. I should count my blessings. Afterall, I have 2 healthy kids and a loving husband. I am leading a comfortable life eventhough I am not rich. The expansion of the business would bring me away from the kids more often that I want to, but I do not have much choices, do I?

Sick

Everyone is sick, or almost sick today, so we spent a lazy day staying at home. Anyway, with the mega event going on near my void deck and the few parking spaces available with the tentage taking up the entire space, I doubt we could find a parking space if were to go out and return.

Justin is down with high fever, dirrahoe and phelgmy cough. Before he slept, I put him on nebuliser as I noticed his heart rate was beating faster than usual and I heard some wheezing.

Joel is also down with phelgmy cough but he is faring slightly better than his brother.

Hubby seems to be going down with flu. He knows it when it's coming and he told me that he's going to fall sick.

As for me, I am down with a cold and has been feeling headachy, body aches and lethargic the entire day.

The kids and hubby have been playing with xbox almost the entire day, so much that it really drives me nuts. Hubby had alot of work to complete but I don't see him doing much, and the kids had became violent with the games that they played. I was so pissed that I forbid the kids to play. I know that hubby feel I am unreasonable but what the heck! If I cannot control him and his stupid games, I can jolly well control my sons! They are my children and I have every right to let them play or stop them from playing. I told Justin and Joel not to make me angry with their constant whining or I'll just throw the xbox away.

It just irriates me to see the kids constantly facing the stupid TV and getting wild and agitated when playing games. Hubby thinks that it is no big deal and it is a boy's thing. But to me, it is a BIG deal.

I hope tomorrow Justin will feel better. When he falls sick, he usually gets very sick and it worries me. I also notice the trend that when we change our plants, we will usually fall sick. I don't know why but apparently, it's all fengshui explanation I guess. Sometimes, it's not that bad if we buy small plants. But this time round, we have bought big plants so I guess the impact is felt much more. Usually, things will get better after a while after the "balancing" of qi is complete. So, I just hope all of us will feel better soon.

Feeling crabby

I'm feeling so crabby today! I usually sleep about 5 hours a day. But today since Justin and Joel did not go to school, I decided to sleep longer. When I woke up, I have a massive terrible headache and I am so groggy beyond belief. I also feel like my whole face is swelling up. Shit! If I know this is how I would react with more sleep, I wouldn't have slept so much! I slept at 2.30am yesterday and woke up at 10 am today. Usually I wake up at 7am during their school days. So now I know, 8.5 hours is considered too much sleep for me!

Then Justin and Joel are falling sick. At first it was Joel. Now, it's Justin. They are coughing. Gosh! I hope this is not the start of the falling sick cycle!

Also, hubby irritates me. He talked alot about application of his leave and I really have no patience to hear so much of it. I know he feels happy yet is very concern. I know... I know... but please tell me when I am in a better mood. Not when I am in a foul mood since it would intensified my headache. I told him to shut up and slammed down the phone on him. Such a nice wifey right?

Then the whole house is so noisy that I feel like screaming! How on earth did the kids get so loud?? Can't they talk softer?? Why do they need to quarrel so much?? I feel like taping their mouth to shut them up! I need peace and silence!!

Talking about noise, there is a MASSIVE tentage set up in front of my car park. It is for the national day dinner this saturday when 3 constituencies of people are coming together under this single tentage to have their dinner as well as listen to songs and music. OMG! I am going to have a "GREAT" time this Saturday. I saw the gigantic stage that was set up for their roaring music and dance and HUGE speakers brought in. I have never seen anything so massive in my estate before and it is happening right in front of my house! The space of the tentage is easily about 4 HDB flats combined. Holy shit! Almost all the parking lots are taken up. I cannot go out or risk my parking lot taken. I have to stay put in my house and put up with their freaking chinese/hokkien songs and screams! Argghhhhh!!

Just pop 2 painkillers and waiting for the pain to subside. Meanwhile, whoever who step on my toe will be shot by me!

Picture taken from my living room window. Looks far and small but the tentage is actually in front of my house only and is big.

7th Month

One year has passed and tomorrow is the seventh month hungry ghost festival. This used to be my most feared period because I had believed that hungry and angry ghosts would be lurking around taking lives away. I was told to avoid going out at night and we were not supposed to say anything bad during this month or the ghosts would come after us. My mother also told me that more people died in unnatural ways during this month and that really freaked me out. For certain, I wouldn't even think of travelling.

All this has changed since I know Jin. She assures me that hungry ghosts months are no different from other months. Everytime, everywhere, there are spirits around. That changes my perspective because now, I no longer fear the hungry ghost month but all the months! LOLOLOL! Yah boy... I am chicken hearted. Who on earth will be afraid of an ant?? ME! Even a small beetle will send me screaming and running. Jin personally witness my screaming fiasco and has to help me catch moth, beetle or whatever in my house. LOL! I sure hope the kids don't take after me. Joel seems to have the potential of being a mini "me", Justin on the other hand is more calm and cool.

Back to the hungry ghost seventh month, it doesn't really freak me out as it used to be. I even travelled during this period. Business can't stop for anything. The only problems I forsee during this month is the massive tentage offerings that comes with bidding where the man will shout at the top of his voice. Staying in a low floor unit, the noise irritates the hell out of me. On top of that, the burning of offerings at the void deck makes my house all smoky and dusty. That's just the disadvantage of staying at a lower floor.

Scared, Uncertain, Elated... what should I feel?

Finally, the hubby's leave is approved but not without some shit from his director. In my heart and his heart, we know he will leave this job for good. Holding on to this job for 2 months is like a false security blanket. How to do anything with a mere 2 months of leave? I know there is no turning back. I support his move because I can see how unbearable it has become to work in that kind of job though it fetches a decent income.

I am filled with alot of uncertainty and fear. Hubby assures me that he will not disappoint me and told me to have faith in him. This is a turning point in our life and it scares me. I know life still moves on. We have reached this juncture in our life and I know we will have to make the best out of it. There is a reason for everything, for how things happen the way they are, and I tell myself to just go with the flow.

May I and the hubby be blessed with strength and wisdom to bring us forward to the next chapter of our life.

Happy and Sad

Hubby would be applying for unpaid leave from around September to focus on our business. Currently, we plan it for 2 months. He hasn't got his approval yet but he would be speaking to the director tomorrow. Having spent in the orgnaisation for the past 10 years, I believe his organisation should logically give him 2 months of unpaid leave. Afterall, 10 years is not a short time. Now, it is just waiting for his director to give the go-ahead sign.

Now, my concern is whether I would be used to him staying at home and I faced him more often. When he's at work, I have some "me" time and eventhough I am busy, I think I do enjoy it. I don't know whether I can get used to someone constantly looking over my shoulder and see what I am doing.

Oh gosh, I don't know how I should handle this. On one hand, I am glad that he is finally able to pursue something that he likes. On the other hand, I really need my personal space.

My sister in law

I am just back from visiting my sister-in-law at the hospital. She was admitted to the hospital because she started turning yellowish. She had been vomitting badly and suffering from very bad pain in her tummy and operation area. Doctor suspected it could be infection on the liver that causes the yellow tint on her skin as well as her eyesl. If so, it would be very complicated and dangerous. Result would only be out tomorrow.

I sent my parents there today and paid her a visit as well. However, I left the kids and hubby at home. She had removed her gall a few months ago and I thought all would be well for her. Who knows, she is now down with dunno-what problem. My brother is of course very stressed and upset but there isn't really much that he could do.

Looking at my brother's family, I feel that my own family is very fortunate. My brother's son is born with heart defect (hole in the heart) that doesn't heal by itself. He is supposed to go for operation since last year but his parents are unwilling to. Not long ago, my brother's wife had an operation. Now, she is suspected to have liver infection. My brother's job is shaky too. And medical bill is piling up.

Hope she would be well soon...