Working for reward

Sometime ago, I read in a forum about how a mom teaches her son the value of money by rewarding her son with money for household chores done. This is so that he could save enough money to buy himself a toy that he fancies.

I strongly disagree with this way of reward. I thought keeping the house neat and tidy is the duty of every one staying in the house? If I were to pay my sons for every household chores done, I could just imagine if I fall sick and ask Justin and Joel for help. They would come up to me and asked me, "so mommy, how much are you paying me for washing the dishes?". This is not how I want my sons to be.

I don't believe in rewarding money for obedience too. Yes, they have to learn that money doesn't fall from the sky, but I believe in better ways for them to learn. One such way is through savings from their pocket money.

Hubby and I have derive a way to let Justin and Joel earn their rewards. We don't reward them with money. Hubby made a chart for them to earn stamps. As we are involved in our own business, it is easy for us to find work for them to do. Simple chores that is directly involved with our business. For every assigment that is completed, they would earn a stamp. Every 4 stamps would earn them a reward (not money). The assignments are simple for them but is time consuming. So far, Justin and Joel have been very motivated to earn their stamps. They have been working for hours. And when they get what they earn for, they seems to treasure their stuff more.

Interesting Encounter - No 2

Some time ago, hubby and I used to deal with a supplier whom I believe is involved in the supernatural stuff. I used to see food being offered at a secluded corner at certain times of the day. There were also alot of "Gods" that she prayed to.

There was once hubby and I were really ill in luck. That was when we stayed in a haunted hotel and we were badly disturbed. I wrote about this incident some time ago. At that time, I believe our luck was so low that we somehow offended the "God" in her shop. Hubby accidentally pulled down an idol that they prayed to. Alot of things happened after that. Even when we were back home in Singapore, we were not spared.

Somehow after that, our business decision is to cut off ties with this supplier. We didn't want to be involved in this "entanglement". It takes some settling down. But our business went more smoothly after that. I don't want to think too much out of this thing.

Recently, the pull to get back to this supplier grows stronger and stronger. There were alot of times I was tempted to go back to her. Thoughts of her became more frequent. Even our hotel choice became nearer to her shop. We used to promise ourselves that we would try to avoid that "area" or anywhere near the vicinity. That was why we chose another expensive hotel in a different area eventhough it means we had to pay more for the hotel price. We felt that it was worth it because we didn't want to step on "her" toes again or to be associated with her in any way. Recently though, we seemed to become more attracted to that area.

Our last recent trip, we stayed in the hotel in the vicinity. During our stroll and shopping, we somehow walked towards her shop direction. I guess at that point of time, hubby and I did want to go to her area and I even thougt of going to her shop to buy stock from her since we were so near! Then suddenly, hubby told me, "lets go back!". I think he suspected something was wrong and told me to turn back to our hotel and not walked any further. I was reluctant but I followed him. He has an instint which I know I cannot ignore.

The "attraction" was so strange. It was like a force driving us towards that area. I wonder what would happen if we decided to resume our business with her, or to go near to her area. I shudder at the thought, of the repercussion.

It is not easy to do business at the place where I do. Besides prices, there are so much considerations, so much concerns. One has to be very strong in the will power and must not be timid. Most of the times, I am pretty sure what I want but I am cowardly when it comes to anything supernatural. Together with my superd imagination, those are my losing points. Plus when it comes to this particular supplier, I think my willpower not to patronise her shop is still not firm yet because her products still carry some selling point. The thing is, if you consider the possible repercussion, it is not worth it for us to earn that amount of profit I can derive from selling her products. The repercussion may be too much for us to bear. I have to work on that willpower! Hubby is not that affected because when it comes to deciding what stock to buy, the decision mainly lies on me due to my experience.

As for hubby, he is alright but sometimes, his mouth react faster than his brain and he does get himself into unneccesary trouble with the words he said, unknowingly.

Interesting Encounter - No 1

Usually when I come back, there is bound to be some stange or interesting encounters to relate. Today is no exception.

It is not the hotel this time. I was too exhuasted to notice or observe things when I was in the hotel anyway, since I am having my menses and was dead tired!

We were picked up and driven to the factory by the boss personally. Earlier on, we complained to him that his worker was late to fetch us and we were in a big hurry to catch our flight. We told him to tell his worker not to be late. So today, the boss came personally, driven by his worker to fetch us, and they were punctual. In fact, they were early. Along the way to his factory, there was no traffic jam. We reached his factory at record speed.

Discussion with him went smoothly. In fact, hubby's discussion was so fast today. As for me, I chose inventory in record speed too. When we were almost done, we looked at the clock and were surprised that it was still early. It was about 2pm and our flight was at 8.10pm. His worker was supposed to drive us from the factory directly to the airport. But 2pm was too freaking early!

We were restless and hubby commented that there was still so much time left that we didn't know what to do. He suggested that next time we shouldn't go so early. Eventhough I didn't talk much, I did agree with him, in my heart. And was grumbling to myself that why is time passing so slow! My God! What are we supposed to do with that 6 hours?? I was thinking that next time we shouldn't go so early.

Such "innocent" thoughts and words. I didn't know they could have a repercussion! From the time the words came out of the mouth, nothing went quite right after that. Order got screwed up causing unneccessary delay. It wasn't the boss's fault. We were confused and messed up our own order. Nevermind, when we got it settled, it was already past 5pm. We thought we still had time. We didn't think that the road to the airport could be jammed! Nevermind, we still managed to arrive at the airport at 7pm (flight was at 8.10pm). We quickly unloaded our luggages. We thanked the worker and he drove off. I wasn't bother with luggages because it has always been hubby's job to make sure all the luggages were properly packed and accounted for. So, all along, I won't know how many luggages we had. BUT. at that moment of time when the worker drove off, my instinct kicked in, and I just suddenly asked hubby, where is that purple luggage? OMG! We had left it in the car and the worker had driven off. I also know that to drive back to the airport quickly to hand us the luggage was almost impossible because there was no u-turn. It was just a long stretch of expressway right to the city about 1 hour away.

No matter what, I NEED my luggage back because inside that bag contained my used clothes and panties. Moreover, I'm having menses and I'm not comfortable with them holding my used clothes, and my panties! We called the boss to ask the worker to pass the luggage back to us. Nevermind the items inside, I just want my used clothes back!

To make matter worse, the airline changed our flight and we were pushed forward to an earlier different flight! So instead of 8.10pm, our new flight would take off at 7.45pm. Gosh! We were so nervous. There we were at 7.10pm, still waiting for our luggage and the check in counter was going to close any moment.

Finally, he drove back and we got our luaggage! He must have found a way to turn back to the airport! Blessed us! We were very very late. Then we realized that instead of Teminal one at the airport, the new flight was at Terminal two! We had to run from the far end of Teminal one to the other end of Terminal two with 5 luggages and 2 heavy backpacks! My God! We were so nervous!

In the end, we had to skip our dinner and ran all the way to our plane! We had planned to have a slow and satisfying dinner at the airport since we thought we would be early. Because of all these unexpectated outcomes, we had to go without food and starve!

Phew... we are finally back! In the end, we were not early. We didn't have to grumble about being early at the factory because our "wish" came true and we weren't early and didn't even have 1 minute to "lobo" around. Instead, we were very late. So late that we nearly missed our flight! I know better now to keep my mind clear and hubby to keep his mouth shut!

I am disappointed....

... that my menses come today.

That means, I am not pregnant :(

That means, I am going to have a hell lot of problems going for my business trip tomorrow and coping with my tummy cramps and heavy flow :(

That means I am going to feel crappy for the next few days :(

That means I am going to take it out on hubby and make him pissed :(

Ah well.... probably that explains my weepy mood and pessismism as I am going through PMS...

BBQing

I just came back from a feast of BBQ food and my tummy feel as if it's going to explode! Gosh! I am so bloated and feel so sick of oily fattening food!

We had a chalet today. It is supposed to be a 2 days 1 night affair but we cut it short and made it a 1 day outing. We didn't stay overnight eventhough we have paid for a 2 days 1 night package. I mean, I would rather sleep at home, in the comfort of my bed than squeeze with everyone in a small room that stinked of BBQ smoke. There are 4 adults and 2 kids. How are we going to squeeze in 4 single beds? So I told the hubby that since we would be fetching my parents home late at night, we may as well check out and return home.

We had chicken wings, pork, chicken franks, chinese sausages, sweet potatoes, satays etc etc, the usual BBQ stuff. Now, I feel so sick of all these meat and crave for something light and refreshing.

Now that I am back home, I feel so comfortable and relax. Chalet is nothing fantastic. I much prefer my home. The only reason we wanted to go for chalet is to spend some quality family time when the kids can have all our undivided attention. We would be leaving for our business trip this Tuesday and we hope to spend some time with them. The kids do seem happy though. I am the tired one, fetching everyone here and there, including my parents! LOL

Ignorance is Bliss ?

I still find ignorance is bliss. Compared with the hubby, I find that my mind is so much more innocent and "pure". I am curious and I would often ask supernatural stuff but I've learnt through my lessons that I should not probe further than I'm able to handle.

I don't like to know supernatural stuff that is associated to our day-to-day living because I prefer my life to be simple. If I meet alot of hiccps, I'll take it as bad luck. If I constantly received good rewards, then I think I am blessed. As simple as that. I only like listening to encounters or strange occurances that doesn't affect me. And I always tell hubby to only let me know things that I can change, not things that I cannot change. What's the point of knowing when you do not have the power to change situations and people? Wouldn't I be making myself more miserable by knowing more?

Sometimes, I do feel I have some instinct in certain sense. But I don't think much about it. Good if I can act on my instinct in the correct way, but if I can't, I just blame it on my stupidity in life.

Hubby knows more supernatural things than me and he is contended the way he is. As he always pointed out, somebody needs to know what is actually happening and he would be the one since I am so cowardly (LOL). As for me, I like the way I am. I don't try to figure out why things happen the way they are. I don't like to challenge situations, in the supernatural way. I always believe everything happens for a reason. People say "Life is as complex as we want to make it to be". But for me, I see it as "Life is as simple as I want to make it to be". In chinese, we have a "proverb" that goes "Sha Ren You Sha Fu". Directly translated, it is something like "Silly people is blessed with luck in a silly way". I hope to be the silly one who is blessed with luck, nevermind if it is in a silly way. LOL

Ancestral Tablet Commotion

As usual, today all of us go to my parents' place for dinner. Justin and Joel had their dinner first and followed by hubby and me.

My parents' house has an ancestral tablet and a diety for their prayer.

While we were having our dinner, the kids were playing in the living room. My parents' house was a 3 room flat and therefore it was pretty small. There wasn't much space for them to run around. All of a sudden, I heard a crash. Followed by hubby's very loud and booming shout. Gosh! I think I was scared more of hubby's loudness (which can easily be heard by the entire block, even the next block!) then the crash. My mom got a shock too, because of hubby's shout. Needless to say, Justin was scared out of his wits.

I ran out to the living room to take a look. The top part of the joss stick holder (xiang lu) was overturned and some of its content spilled out. The holder didn't overturned. It was just the top portion that dropped out. Justin had accidentally knocked the joss stick holder with his toy golf stick! He burst out crying because he was too scared of his daddy. I quickly asked Justin to say "sorry". My mom quickly went over, took Justin's hand and prayed and apologised. My dad heard the commotion, came to the living room and told us "it's OK, no problem".

Justin quietened down and continued tearing. While I continued dinner with hubby, I asked him whether it's ok with hubby if I let Justin prayed with joss sticks to "offically" apologised for the "accident". Hubby didn't want to, at first. His rationale is, if Justin hadn't use much joss stick, why should he start using now? Moreover my parents have said that it's OK about the incident. But in the end, he told me he would leave the decision to me, since it's at my parents' house that such thing happened and I am part of my parents' family. I made the decision to let Justin prayed with joss stick to apologise. My rationale is that, if he did something wrong, whether or not it is done on purpose, he should be sorry. Sure, my parents find Justin's act forgiveable. But, no matter what, the wrong was not done to my parents but the ancestral tablet. So, just apologise and move on. I don't take in hubby's rationale.

Justin was very quiet at my parents' home. But now that he's back home, he's much better. I still think hubby shouldn't shout so loud. He can reprimand Justin but he doesn't need to shout at the top of his voice. It is not a small issue, but it is not a big issue either. At least, it happens at my parents' house and not at a stranger's house. I still remember how hubby knocked a figurine of prayer when he was in Thailand. THAT, is more worrisome than this.

A question that I pondered....

There are certain questions that Jin posts that will set me thinking for a long time.

This is one of them.

What will I do if I know I'm dying, and I have a choice to swap my destiny with someone else so that I won't die? I know I will choose death, for my conscience. For fear that my karma will affect my children and the next generation.

But putting conscience and karma aside, what do I really want to do if say, I know I will be dying next week? How could I possibly leave Justin and Joel, when the elder child is barely 6? True, I have my hubby to be the guardian and I know he will love them with all his heart. But somehow, deep inside me, I know there is no one who will love my children as much as I do. I carry them in my womb for 9 months. Who will understand that kind of bond that a mother shares with her child?

Then I think of Arlene. Ohh... that sicko, that idoit, that fat ass! I don't mind swapping my life with an asshole like her, to make myself live longer *evil grin*

The bottom line is, fear of bad karma and conscience still rule me. But if I were to throw karma and conscience out of the window, yes, I will do it. If I can, I will find someone whom I dislike to swap my death sentence with. So if I am a master now, I'll start keeping records of those who step on my toe. kekeke...

A coward

I am a coward when it comes to anything that is supernatural. That's why hubby tried to avoid talking to me about supernatural stuff irregardless of how much I tried to probe him. Being curious (also known as KPO), I will try to manipulate and "forced" out issues which he knows but prefer not to tell me. When I finally get out the truth from him, I will scare the hell out of myself, and I'll live my days in fear and super imagination.

Just like today, Jin called, hubby picked up the phone, and I know they talk about some supernatural stuff. Then this evening, I was very curious because I heard "cigeratte", "black magic" etc etc, so I tried to ask him to tell me what was the conversation about. Today, I don't have to probe much and he tells me the brief, "harmless" conversation that he thought wouldn't have any impact on me.

Then comes the drama.

Pony came into the room and greet us goodnight. I turned, saw her in a black t-shirt, immediately jumped out of my chair and screamed! My actions were really dramatic! So drama that hubby got a shock and he jumped! Pony burst out laughing and kept apologising to me.

I know I can be very drama at times. But I didn't know I can be so drama as to get shock over a human being! I am still suffering from the after-effect of the revelation and am still over-working my imagination!

Sometimes, it's better not to be too interested in things I should not be interested in. Like the proverb goes, "Curiosity killed the cat!".

Coincidence

Hubby and I actually plan to go for our overseas business trip this week. But somehow, he has been dragging his feet and has an unexplained feeling that he doesn't wish to go. I had wanted to go this week because there were some samples that we needed to pass urgently to our manufacturer.

I was about to make a booking for the air flight tickets when Jin called us to chat. Hubby happened to speak to her because I was engaged with work. When she knew that we were going overseas, I heard from hubby that she sounded a little surprise. She later told the hubby that she had a bad feeling towards us going overseas.

This sounds like a coincidence. First, it was hubby who was dragging his feet and was reluctant to go (very unlike him). Then it was Jin's comment and her "surprise" The time she called when I was about to place an internet booking for the air ticket was also somewhat strange. She rarely called me at 11+am partly because I need to fetch Justin at that time from school. She has called me in the morning or late afternoon but rarely in the early afternoon.

With all these co-incidences, as much as I feel we need to travel this week for business purpose, all plans have been postphoned and air flights booked for next week instead. Sometimes, I guess, we just have to go with the flow and trust the higher forces to guide us through.

Elaine's version of Hong Kong Noodles

As per Aishah's request, the recipe is as follow, taught to me by my mom. The added vegetables and meats are optional. I just added whatever I could find in my fridge. You can even add fish slices if you want to. It is a very versatile dish. It resembles our chinese dish called "Hor Fun".

Ingredients
1. Hong Kong Noodles (or substitute with any of your prefered noodles)
2. Small slices of chicken (marinate with soya sauce, sesame oil, pepper, alittle rice wine, corn flour for at least 1 hr)
3. Mushrooms
4. Carrots
5. Green vegetables
6. Prawns
7. Crabsticks
8. Fishballs


Soup base
Chicken bones (I used quite alot)
1 handful of dried Scallops
A few slices of ginger
A handful of garlic, lightly smashed


Step 1
Boil a kettle of water. Use the boiling water to scald the chicken bones. This is to get rid of any fishy smell.

Boil a pot of water. When it starts to boil, then placed the chicken bones, scallops, ginger and garlic into the soup. Do not placed the chicken bones before the water boils.

Let the soup boil for at least 1 hour. If you want the soup to be thicker, boil it longer.


Step 2
Use hot water to soak the noodles until soft. After taking the noodles out, rinse it with cold water. Set aside


Step 3
Prepare all ingredients to add to the hong kong noodles.


Step 4
Once soup is ready, discard the bones. In another small bowl, add corn flour and water. Then pour the corn flour mixture slowly into the soup, stirring constantly to ensure the right consistency. It must be alittle thick. You may want to add an egg inside the soup. Add alittle dark soya sauce for the color. And add salt to taste. Keep the soup slightly boiling during this process.

Step 5
Pour some soup in a claypot, when the soup boils, add meat and vegetables. Add noodles at the last stage. And viola! It's ready for serving! With some green chilli. My version of hong kong claypot noodles. A very simple and nutritous 1 dish meal!


P.S Just rememeber that to make the soup sweet, you have to be generous with the bones and scallops.

Nice Food!

I have good meals today. This morning, I woke up to a hot bowl of vegetarian porridge and a cup of coffee. Hubby has gone to the market early in the morning to buy me the porridge. Recently, eversince he starts his leave, I have the fortune of waking up to nice breakfast everyday. He would buy breakfast for me when he bring Justin to school. It could be prata, pancake, porridge or bao (chinese buns). Wheras for Joel and I, we no longer have to wake up early in the morning. We would sleep till we are contended. *giggles*

In the afternoon, I decided to take a break from Pony's cooking. I cook. I cooked Hong Kong Claypot noodles and it is simply delicious. I am not a great and consistent cook. Sometimes, the same dish could turn out awful. Just happen that today, I cook it really nice. To make the soup sweet without the harmful effect of MSG, I boil the soup with lots of chicken bones, scallop, ginger and garlic. I seasoned the meal the way my mom taught me, throw in mushroom, lots of vegetables, prawns etc. Then I thicken the soup with starch and put in the hong kong noodles, and viola! the noodles is ready. It is very nice with just the right sweetness. Hubby was complimenting it all the way (he has to! Or risk me not cooking anymore. hehehee).

This evening, it is again a wonderful meal cooked by my mom. I have cod fish, bean sprouts with carrots and beancurb, stir fried spinach, eggs, herbal soup, and pork cooked in dark soya sauce with chestnut and mushroom. Plus white bun steamed with pandan leaf. The pork and mushroom is supposed to wrap inside the bun to be eaten together. It was delicious as my mom had cooked the pork for a long time and the fragrance and texture was really good. Much better than restarant standard! I never really fancy chinese mushrooms but my mom cooked it so soft and fragant that I took a couple of them.

As usual, my mom cooked lots and we couldn't finish all the food. We have small appetites. My FIL has a big appetite but even with him around, we couldn't finish all the dishes. He appears to be satisfied with the meal (he is always critical of other people's food eventhough he can't cook well and he won't compliment others if someone has cooked it well). I thought of Jin, and was thinking it would be nice she could join us and I'm sure she could finish up all the food! I never have problem with leftover with Jin joining us for dinner. LOL!

BURP...................

Reach my target weight

Finally, I have reached my target weight. I take about 6 months to lose 12 kg (26 pounds). Actually, I was still about 2.5 kg heavier in the last month and I felt that it was absolutely impossible to shed that 2.5kg. Then I was hit by food poisoning and after that, I didn't manage to recover my apetite again. I lost that 2.5kg unintentionally and reached my target weight. I am not too sure whether I will continue to lose my weight.

Moreover, after my food posioning episode, I am overwhelmed with extreme tiredness. It is a feeling as if I have run a dozen marathons. Initially, I thought I was pregnant. I tested with the home pregnancy kit, it was negative. I bought another and tested again, it turned out negative too. So, I am quite sure that I am not pregnant. However, I cannot confirm since both tests were carried out before the date my menses is due.

I am having mixed feelings. On one hand, I hope to be pregnant, but on the other hand, I don't think I am prepared for it. There are so much implications by me being pregnant. I am also fearful of cessarean operation. Those long months of healing! And the dreaded hospital stay! OMG!

On the vanity side, I just regain my figure and I do wish to enjoy the slimmer me for a while before I put on weight again when I became pregnant. I have just joined yoga and I had intended to go for gym to train my body. But if I were to become pregnant, all these have to be put on hold. And God knows when I am able to regain my figure again.

Gosh! I think I am just a person with too much conflicting thoughts. I wish to be pregnant, and I wish not.

Blast the CAT!

I have a stalker and it's the damn bloody black cat! Gosh, I want to cry! Why can't the shitty cat let me off???!!!

This damn cat has already given me a hell lot of problems. Somehow, this cat just seemed to like/hate me alot. It would loiter outside my house, or it would follow me when I go out. Even if hubby tried to chase it off, the damn cat would not move much, and would glare at me. Shit! I HATE it! If only I have the gut to grab it (which I don't *SOB*), I would mince it and cooked it for other cats to eat. Maybe I'll torture it too. That's how much I HATE it!

I swear if the bloody cat stepped into my house again, I would kill it! I will whack the shit out of the damn black cat! ASSHOLE!

Stop following me, DAMN IT! Go follow hubby, go follow Jin, BUT NOT ME, BLOODY SHIT!!

Little updates

Just some updates for a few of my friends who are reading my blog :)

Hubby had a talk with Lani yesterday on her very bad attitude. From what I gather (body language and gut instinct), I don't think she is interested to work here anymore. I believe she is looking at employment in Hong Kong. She thinks she has a sister to look after her and she has a very rosy picture of that place. Honestly, from my more than 1.5 years of working with her, I don't think she can survive in Hong Kong, where employers have a high expectation of independance and competency in domestic work. She cannot cook, she doesn't clean well and she has a poor understanding of english. She also has an attitude which takes a long time to get used to. Even until now, when she is with me for so long, she still cannot understand what I say from time to time. Maybe she thinks that she has a sister to fall back on, but don't forget, her sister, ultimately, is still a domestic worker there with no influence whatsoever. Her sister is the one who haunt her for money and wants Lani to repay her every single cent she has spent on Lani since young. It makes me wonder, what kind of sister she is and how much she would help Lani in times of troubles.

Maybe Lani thinks that Jin is all praises on how well she can look after Miracle, that makes her think she is competent to look after babies. Lani is wrong. Maybe she can, for a short while and on occasional basis. But if you asked her to look after a baby as one of her main duties, I don't think she can hold the job. She cannot look after babies and I won't recommend her to anyone who is looking for a helper to look after her baby. Even if the house is on fire, she would still be snoring away. I have tried banging the whole door down, and she could still sleep through it.

I have alot of patience for my helpers, if not, I would have sent her away within the 6 months she was here. From an employer point of view, she is not a competent worker and it would be a very big mistake if she leaves here. In fact, initially, I have a whole lot of opportunites and pay increment awaiting her if she is loyal enough. Of course, I'm keeping all these thoughts to myself. It is her destiny. Once she steps out of this house, our fate will end and how she continues her own destiny is her business.

On another note, hubby started his leave and I'm having less time at the PC. Not that he is restricting me, but I am a very private person and would prefer surfing my blog without anyone beside me. With him working beside me, I would rather not surf. I forsee myself spending less time at the PC, in my blog, until I am able to get used to his presence. LOL

Ok, that's it for now. I have to put the kids to bed. Good night!

The Don'ts during the Hungry Ghost Month

This article is found in a popular local chinese magazine (i weekly). I try my best to translate it to english but I know I'm super bad with translation. It is an article that "educate" people about the dos and don'ts during the hungry ghost month.

Don't take all these seriously cos I beleive most are not true. It is meant for entertainment purpose. I thought some of them are quite comical though.

1. No wind chimes at the front of the bed
In olden china, taoist priest used bells to lure spirits. Spirits cannot distinguish the sound between wind chimes and bells.

2. No outings at night
If your luck is low, and you do now have enough yang energy, you would be easily disturbed by spirits. If you see such sightings, you may fall easily sick.

3. No removal of leg hairs
With more leg hairs, spirits wouldn't dare to come near

4. No stealing of food meant for spirits
Food that has eaten by spirits has lost much of its "flavour". Moreover these food may have some kind of negative energy in it, and may clash with your yang energy.

5. No hanging out of clothes at night to dry
Spirits may be hidden inside these clothes. When you bring in these clothes, they may follow in.

6. No calling/shouting of people's name
When you are out at night, you are not supposed to call out people's name. Even if somebody call you, you should not turn back. It could be spirits that are calling. Spirits do not have eyes. In their eyes, people are like "pixel". So, if they are out for revenge, they may remember the names and recognize by people's reaction to name calling. (??? I'm totally confused by this point)

7. No swimming
Especially if you want to save someone struggling in water, you have to make sure that your yang energy is very powerful, if not, you will be dragged down into the water

8. Don't sleep late
If you sleep late, your body will be weak and will easily be ill. When you are ill, your yang energy will reduce and therefore easier to meet spirits.

9. No leaning against the wall
Spirits like to walk near the wall. If you walk near the wall, you would be easily possessed.

10. No picking up of money on the roads
You won't know whether there is any develish energy in this money.

11. No placement of chopstick in the middle of the rice.
Resembles joss stick in an urn(not too sure whether it is called an "urn"). Such practice will invite spirits to share the food with you.

12. No taking of photos at night
May include spirits in the photos as well.

Backstabbing and what I think

Hubby has been very unhappy with his job especially the people. The good thing is, he is going for unpaid leave starting tomorrow, with the intention of resigning ultimately. He will be focusing on our business.

His job pays decently but the kind of people there are ugly. Before he goes on his leave, he was backstabbed by his immeidiate superior. He asked me, should he fight back? Because it serves no purpose. I told him, go for it. It wouldn't change a single thing by fighting back because the people are all crap, but by fighting back, he would have done something for himself.

If I encounter backstabbing at work, I won't swallow it without a fight. I will make sure I return double of what the culprit does to me, even if it means losing my job. To me, integriry and self esteem are more important factors than money. I obey authority but I will not bow down to anyone. I am a very proud person. I'll be nice to people who are decent to me. But I'll certainly not take shit that is thrown at me.

I know such character of mine has its flaws. But I don't really bother. At the end of the day, as long as I am able to raise my head up high and know I have fought for my rights and dignity, I am contended.

I used not to be such a "hard" person. But as I grow older, I become more stubborn and can be very inflexible when it comes to my principles. Well, it can be good and bad, I guess...

Look! No tooth!

Justin just dropped one of his milk tooth. He was so proud and told all of us he has grown up already!

Lovely Baby!

I was looking through my photo album when I came across this photo that brings so much warmth to my heart.

She is Jin's lovely Miracle!

Stupid website

I have just managed to type out a long entry today, and guess what, blogger decided to hang on me, and I lost the entry that I have typed out for the past 45 mins!

I'm so frustrated! I think I am suffering a mental block now and I can no longer write what I had just written and lost! *pissed*

Nightmare

I had an uncle whom my parents hate alot. He had passed away some time ago.

This uncle was a good-for-nothing. After he came out from the prison, he spent his days drinking and gambling. My other uncles and aunties didn't want to stay with him and they "pushed" him to stay together with us because they claimed that the house didn't belong to my dad, it was a rental property that was passed down by my grandparents.

Being poor, my dad didn't have the ability to find another house to rent for us to stay. The place that he was paying for rental was cheap and that was all he could afford. This uncle constantly created trouble for us. Whenever he was drunk (which was almost a daily affair), he would grow violent and attacked all of us. He smashed bottles and made a mess of the house.

One incident that I remembered vividly till today was when he nearly caused the death of my dad. The uncle was drunk and made a mess again, and my mom was very unhappy and passed a negative remark. He wanted to hurt my mom. My dad protected my mom, this uncle took a chopper and ran after my dad. He only missed my dad's heart by an inch or so. If my dad didn't run fast enough, he would have been dead. My dad still couldn't forgive him because my dad was the sole breadwinner and we were all still so young, what would have become of us?

My mom had always prevented me from being alone with this uncle. I couldn't understand why but I did know I was very uncomfortable with the weird stares from this uncle. Only when I was older, I began to understand. This uncle was a sicko!

I always remember the cups of urine he had gobbled down. He would go to the toilet, filled up a cup of urine and drank it right in front of my eyes with a sadistic grin. I always wonder whether he ate his shit too.

On the death bed, my uncle asked for my dad. Eventhough my dad had gone to see him, he didn't have the heart to forgive him. As for me, I refused to see him. I just do not have the open heart to forgive him for what he did to my dad.

Yesterday, I had a nightmare of him. In my nightmare, he was trying to get into my house. Hubby and I refused. He couldn't enter, but he tried all ways, all means, all forms of loopholes to get in. When we changed our lock, he would find ways to duplicate one. I don't know what was his intention, but I just knew in my dream that it wasn't a good one. As long as I stepped out of my house, he would tail me wherever I go. I was so scared that he would find a way to enter my house, by the "illegal" means. I woke up in shock, but later fell asleep again, and the nightmare continued. It was horrible. He tried to haunt me but luckily at the time I woke up, he didn't manage to get into my house, yet.

I hope I do not have anymore nightmares of him. I have not thought of him for a long while now, but he managed to creep into my dream. I hope I would never dream of him again. He was awful!

My view on my business

I am in the fashion industry. I sell clothes to mainly the Americans. However I do have customers from other countries such as Canada, UK, France, Finland, Germany, Belgium, Sweden, Japan and others which I cannot remember at this moment.

I won't say my business is run fantastically, I do understand there are alot of areas for improvement and a business is never good enough. However, I dare say that it is run well enough to continue being the leader of what I am selling in my target market at this point in time. I have been in this business for more than 3 years and I have known well enough that innovation in my current line is the key to success. Second comes customer service. When it comes to international sales, customers want reassurance that they will get what they pay for, and if something goes wrong, they would be assured of a good after-sales support. I guess, these areas are something that I could provide to my customers.

Competitors come and go. I can never be too confident that I would be where I am seated, tomorrow. As what hubby correctly pointed out, it is easy to be number 2 position, because you only have 1 competitor (the leader) to battle against. It is a totally different story if you are in number 1. You have all competitors, at the bottom, to watch out for.

Sometimes I feel that I am constantly in a race and I do get tired. I am tired of travelling, tired of being away from my children and spending so little time with them. However, I cannot allow my tiredness to make my work slacken. Whenever I look at entrepreneurs getting complacent when their business grow such that their standard drops, and they start ignoring "small" customers, I always tell myself that I will never allow my business to be in that position. Small and big customers are all important customers to me, that will either make or break me.

I am slowly passing the baton to my hubby to continue where I am. It has been 3 years of my life dedicated fully to this business and I think it's time that I start pursing alittle of my interest since age is catching up. I believe with the support of me, hubby will be equally competent to do a fine job. We have the same philisophy towards business and I will continue to help him until he is confident enough to take over the entire job scope.

Mood Swings

I have got this terrible mood swing which I am trying very hard to control. I get very irritated with hubby but when I try to look for a reason why, I honestly don't know.

I get very irritated with my helpers, for small mistakes which can be ignored. When Pony used Pandan flavor for the konyakku jelly instead of other flavours, I get so mad. But when I look back, it is partly my fault because I didn't tell her specifically what flavour to use.

Then I get very irritated when my dad insist on giving me mooncakes. I told him I don't want but he insists and I get furious. I can be mad with everyone but I don't usually get mad with my dad because he is someone I love alot. Awww.. such small issues to be mad with.

I also get easily weepy. It is not my nature to cry. But now, when I see people crying in the TV programmes, I also want to cry. When I listen to something touching, I also want to cry.

Why am I like that? Must be the stress. Or maybe it's the PMS.

Hua and Shun

I have a family friend, Hua, who regards my parents as her godparents. She is about 40 years old and is a Malaysian married to a Singaporean.

I find her life to be very hard. She was married once in Malaysia. And has 3 children. Her husband later left her for another woman. She has to single-handedly bring up her 3 children. She came to Singapore to work so that she could earn more to feed her family. She got to know this man who is a bus driver, Shun, and he earns a decent income. Shun owns the bus so his income is able to support her family comfortably.

When Hua gets into this relationship, she already knows that Shun is a very possessive man. In fact, Shun is a divorcee and his wife had run away because she could no longer stand Shun unreasonable obsessive control.

Soon after they got together, they were married. The violence started. Shun would hit her whenever he was in bad mood. Still Hua tolerated him. She got pregnant. Shun still hit her. But he shifted the places he hit. He would kick her at the breast, chest, punched her on her face, anywhere except her tummy because Shun claimed that the baby belonged to him and he would not hurt his own flesh and blood.

Hua cannot wear anything revealing or Shun would punch her. She has to cover herself with clothes from top to toe. Hua cannot has any bad comment about Shun's siblings or she would risk being hit again. Shun has no qualms in putting her down in front of everyone. He has even slap Hua in front of his siblings. As long as he is not happy with any words Hua said, a slap is expected.

When the daugher was born, Hua has to make sure that the daughter doesn't cry unneccesarily or Hua would be slapped. The daughter cannot fall down or Hua would be kicked. The daughter cannot fall ill or Hua would be hit again. There was once the daughter suffered from hand, foot, mouth disease and Hua was hit quite badly by Shun. He claimed Hua was an incompetent mother.

Hua has numerous abortion, even after marraige. I just cannot understand why contraceptive is not used! During the last pregnancy of Hua, Shun warned her that he would let her deliver the baby but Hua better make sure that she deliver a boy because Shun only wants boy. Hua prayed very hard and luckily her prayers was answered, she gave birth to a boy.

I rarely see her but when I do, I did talk to her to no avail. I know what is important to her is that Shun continued to pay for the unkeep of her family in Malaysia and provide her a roof over her head. The rest, she can tolerate.

I feel lots of regret knowing that she lets a man handle her like a piece of garbage. No woman should ever let another person, especially a man, do this to her.

Battle of the Blogs

Jin introduced this game to me at blog explosion. I gave it a try and thought it is quite fun, especially it is a break for me from my work. I have been toggling between my work site and blog explosion. Though I am not spending 100% of my time at battle of the blogs, it still does have an impact on the speed that I take to complete my work. So I am telling myself to spend less time at battle of the blogs or I would have tons of work left undone.

Honestly, I am quite a private person and driving traffic to my blog is the last thing on my mind. Here in my blog, I speak of my thoughts, feelings, experiences, my daily life and my children. It is never my intention to share this much of information with the world at large. But I guess, as time passes by, I get used to the idea of an online journal and in sharing my views with complete strangers. Still, I don't write with the aim for people to read. In fact, I would prefer people not to read. *LOL*

So far, I have never won any battle. I have been losing, but it is fine. When it comes to blogging, I do not need another person to tell me whether my blog is good or to get the approval of others. It may not be nice to others but as long as it is nice to me and I appreciate what I write, I guess that is all that matters. Moreover, after staying there for about a day or two, I realize that most of the people do not vote for a blog that they deem as geuinely good. They vote for a blog with a higher chance of winning so that they can obtain the credit. Sometimes, I am guilty of that because I need credits to battle.

Also, there are groups of people who will always support each other. Sometimes, even before a battle ends, you would have known who will win the game.

It can be meaningless. But, isn't this what real life is all about? Isn't this what business is all about? It is all too familiar.

I expect myself to continue losing. And I am not going to make any effort to try to win. But I will still go back from time to time when my work allows. Like I say, it's fine if I lose. Losing is not everything. So what if I lose? I derive much entertainment values out of these games.

Moreover, a "loser" can be equally as popular there too. At least, you would be snatched up very speedily when you put up a challenge to battle. LOL.

Narrow Escape?

During my previous trip overseas to a neighbouring country, I took a budget flight. I have got this phobal towards budget flights, feeling that somewhat they are not as safe as the regular flights. I mean, they have taken off, landed so many times. Surely, their engines (brakes, whatever) must have worn off quite a bit. However, I still took budget flights, not because they are cheap (their flight tickets can be comparable to regular flights tickets), but because I like their timings and it fits my business schedule perfectly.

So, during my most recent business trip, again I took a budget flight as I needed to meet the supplier at a specified time. Every thing went on as usual but I did notice more turbulence than other flights I took. It was only during landing time that freaked me out a little. Firstly, the entire sky was covered with clouds. Vision was nil, making landing impossible. On top of that, everytime when the pilot attempt to land when the sky was cleared a little, the whole plane would shake violently. So the pilots had to abort landing attempts and kept circling the cities. All the while, the plane shook. Everyone tensed up and I got worried. I looked out the window and I couldn't even see anything. It wouldn't worry me if the plane didn't shake so much. I mean, turbulence is part and parcel of a flight journey. But because it was a small plane, it makes me wonder whether the plane could withstand the pressure. I thought of the kids and told myself that I don't want to die. Yeah, I have bought tons of insurance but I just couldn't imagine my kids without daddy and mommy. It would be so sad, isn't it?

Finally, the plane managed to land, with lots of violent shaking. I heaved a sigh of relief.

Within an hour upon the touch down, a plane crashed in Europe and no survivor was found.

Random thoughts....

Yesterday, Pony showed me her clothes. I was still wondering why she showed me her clothes. When I opened them up, I realized that her clothes were all torn. They were being deliberately cut. Pony told me that it was her previous employer that did that to her. I told Pony that the employer must be crazy. All her shorts and shirts were cut. Such a cruel act indeed.

I don't know how I should feel towards my 2 helpers. But I know I am getting really stressed with Lani. I don't mind that she has an odd temperament or if she doesn't like to speak. I just cannot handle her yoyo temperament. She could be playing with the kids so happily and full of zest, but the next day, you would find her slumped in her chair, pulled a long face, ignoring the kids. On top of that, I find that she is a big bully. This is something that really pissed me off. I mean, I am a person who cannot stand any bully in the first place. If I see one, I have to lash out at that bully or I find the suppression torturous. Unless of course, the bully acts do not concern me abit or I find that the victim deserve it, then I would probably shut up.

But, since all these happen in my house, I just find it so hard to keep silent. But when I speak up, I can be very harsh, so alot of times, I refrain myself from any confrontation and adopt a wait-and-see attitude hoping that issues will resolve on their own. But this is just so not-me!

Anyway, I am feeling alot of blues recently. Joel is down with bronchitis and is currently on nebuliser.

As for me, I am just feeling lousy, terrible, frustrated, impatient and tired. I don't know why I am feeling this way, for just the thought of trying to find out what's wrong with me makes me pissed. Sigh...

Baby Project on hold

My recent episode with food poisioning kinda scared me, and hubby. It was scary enough to wake up in the middle of the nights to try to puke but nothing came out. I was adverse to strong smell and all kinds of food. I hate plain water and only drank 100 plus and ribena. There was a strong metallic taste in my mouth that I couldn't stand. I was listless, lethargic and slept almost the whole day.

This reminds me so much of morning sickness. I had almost forgotten how it was like. OMG!

When hubby was patting my back as I desperately tried to puke something out and tears flowed out of my eyes, hubby shook his head and asked me, "is this how you would be like when you get pregnant? Maybe we should not get pregnant at all".

Yeah...maybe I should not. I forgot how it was like to have morning sickness and this food posioning suddenly makes me recall those terrible morning sickness. I read that being pregnant with boy is supposed to be easier for the mommy and being pregnant with girl is harder due to the overwhelming female hormones in the mommy's body. I have boys and I felt bad enough. What happens if I have a girl this time? Am I supposed to feel worse? Am I going to lie flat for 9 months totally handicapped to morning sickness? My God!

I think I will just put this baby project on hold. I know I sound absurb but I don't think I can handle morning sickness!

Weddings at the void deck

There are 2 things which I believe staying in a lower floor unit would be concern. Number 1 is funeral. Number 2 is wedding.

For me, I stay in a low floor unit and I have somewhat gotten used to these 2 occurances. One thing I like about wedding is the happiness and excitment in the atmosphere. Not forgetting the nice aromas of curries, nasi bryani and other wonderful food that never fail to make me drool.

I don't quite like funeral because of the sadness and the somewhat "heavy" atmosphere. It always give me the creep to imagine a dead person lying just at the void deck, not far from where I stay.

Back to the wedding, some families are very considerate. When the time is late, they'll lower their voices and they'll try to have as little activities as possible in the void deck so as not to disturb the families staying at the lower floors.

Currently, my void deck below is preparing for a malay wedding tomorrow, and I have to sigh at their inconsideration. It is past midnight. Kids are still shouting at the top of their voices. Adults talking and laughing so loudly. They are cooking, which is understandable but they don't have to bang and slam their metal pots and pans! Not only that, they drag those pans making those metal screech at such a high pitch that I thought I could go deaf. All these are done late into the night when my kids are trying their best to sleep and I see many households with their lights off.

I honestly don't mind weddings. But I just wish people could be more considerate especially towards children who need to sleep. Sure, there will be chattings and laughter, afterall it is a happy event. You can talk and laugh, but you do not need to scream and screech hysterically, not right to the wee hours of the morning! We share the joy, but please do understand that we need to sleep too.

To Aishah and Jin

I know you two read my blog, so I'm writing it here.

Aishah,
I'm SO sorry that yesterday was a bad meetup. It wasn't meant to be this way. I was still dreaming away on us yakking away while the kids enjoyed themselves. But I didn't know that I had to be hit with that bout of food poisoning.

I felt like shit and really didn't have any energy to talk. In fact, when you went home, I spent most of my time sleeping away. I'm sorry that I didn't keep to my promise in buying the indian rojak and some muslim food that I planned to. I couldn't make it to the market and I didn't trust my helper to buy the selection I wanted to. I didn't keep to my promise to send you home and you had to return in that kind of rain with 2 little kids in tow. Really really sorry.

The hubby is convinced that you wouldn't return again. *SOB* Afterall, we are such a bad host to you. I promise you that I would make it better the next time, ok?


Jin,
Sorry that I didn't spend much time yakking with you. And I really didn't bother much about your dinner. I just left you on your own. Actually there were alot of food (I realize it only today), but I didn't prepare them for you. There were also the special chilli noodles that my mom had cooked, but I didn't offer that to you too. I should have prepared the meals for you, because Lani's preparation wasn't right. But I didn't have energy to bother with that. In fact, I was feeling progressively worst as dinner approached. So, I just slammed myself in the sofa and slept.

BUT, I am not feeling as bad towards you as I feel towards Aishah. LOL. This is not the first time you're here anyway so I'm sure you can help youself to anything in my house with no constraint.

By the way, Aishah and Jin, I'm feeling better today. I can start eating a tiny winy bit (but can't stomach too much food and too oily food), I feel less naseous, and I'm constantly thirsty. I'm surprised that I went almost without food(and water) the whole of yesterday. That should do some good to my weight. LOL